Being Gay

Everyday I experience something that reminds me we are all connected and I know that God is good.

I know this with every breath I take and I am grateful knowing that I am blessed.

Today I want to share my happiness of what it means to be a God parent.

I am completely aware that children are evidence not just of the love between their parents but especially of God’s blessings and of Gods love.

Generally speaking we seem to forget to easily that it is God’s choice in blessing parents with the gift of bearing children.

There are so many parents who take their children for granted and do not allow them to grow in ways they want.

It is the sole responsibility of the parents to bestow first and foremost a sense of love.

To fill their character with the reverence of compassion and empathy for all humanity and Gods creatures as well as our planet.

It is incumbent that parents teach/mentor their children on the lessons of love without expectation.

Love with an open heart and mind.

Love without judgement or prejudice.

As is the way of God we are here to be of service in whatever capacity one chooses to others.

In order to do this we mush first have the understanding that love heals all no matter what the circumstance.

That each of us is born with divine power bestowed upon us through the living Christ which resides within.

It matters not that it took me so very long before I choose this path when it had been presented to me many times before, what matters now is that I embrace the daily lessons along the way.

I know what my purpose is and that it has always been present yet I didn’t know how to connect with it through all the baggage of the past.

When I forgave everyone for everything my life changed within that same breath of saying “I forgive”.

When I realised and accepted the truth that I could never be separate from my presence that was the defining moment, just the beginning and the foundation of healing was revealed.

It was the most important decision I could make in my entire life at this time of my life.

We must understand that every decision we make has some effect, some impact on other people’s lives somewhere in our life whether it’s family, friends or peers.

My being gay is not what defines me rather it is just a leaf on a branch on my tree of life.

We must be careful not to let the past take up residency in our present for it will surely prevent you from moving forward.

I choose a life to mirror the presence within, to project love in every way and means I can.

I share with you this parting thought;

If you truly want to know the presence of God, evidence of God, look in the mirror.

 

 

Being gay

I have seen a lot in my fifty-four years so I am glad to see that even us gay people are finally beginning to gain visibility.

It takes me back to a time in the sixties when inter racial marriage was a crime in most states.

However after a while and with determined perseverance it came to pass as will the issues that prohibit us from having the same HUMANE rights as all others.

Isn’t it peculiar that so many of the folks who make and support these laws both politically as well as religiously break them!

So many sexual crimes against our children are by heterosexual individuals whether it’s their own parents, a family member, acquaintances, family friends or even teachers not to forget your local priests.

There are those in the community who would have you believe that gay people are sexual deviants, repulsive individuals, portray us as  pedophiles, that it’s a choice but can be cured. They are determined to create an environment of constant mistrust and suspicion.

What they don’t tell you is all the things we contribute not only to our communities but our families, friends, churches and so much more that is far more important than anyone realises.

They don’t seem to mind us decorating your homes, styling your hair or creating a better look in dressing you but when it comes to what we truly are in reality how many of you who pass judgement even know a gay person?

The sexual deviants in my experience have been males within the family, friends of the family and ALWAYS heterosexuals.

There are those in every community who are driven to instill fear to promote their own agendas and even cover up their own shaded affairs.

They will go to any lengths to exploit their own fears to create havoc and chaos against gay people.

If we fear anything it should be the epidemic of ignorance running amuck in this country.

I can’t image what other countries such as the Providences of Canada, Mexico and most o Europe think when they hear or read the goings on concerning the gay population.

They support their gay communities by not treating them with indifference and giving them the same rights as all others.

The older I get the more I see bigots and hypocrites coming out of the woodwork standing on their soapboxes.

Equality is not just a birth right but God’s blessings as well because after all we are all made in His image.

To all of those who teach their young children to hate and deny them the truth you will have to answer for those actions and decisions when the time comes for you to pass on.

Our goal in life, our vision and purpose should be to love in every capacity possible.

How you define love is on you, there is so much more to it then sex.

 

Being Gay

I know quite a few people whose parents don’t interfere in the decisions their children make in regards to what course or career they would pursue.

Many of these kids parents supported these children rather than try to mold them.

When the adults in our life instill characteristics such as love, respect, compassion, empathy, kindness, gratitude and a sense of responsibility everyone grows up with a healthy attitude.

Kids generally want to accomplish their dreams in life and parents would we wise to consider their wants as well.

A sense of companionship and compatibility is established that no amount of peer pressure cannot divide.

Life is not about a parents control or humility over their children.

Life should be about the pursuit of encouraging our children to be kind and loving humane beings.

It would be responsible to give your children as much respect as you expect of them because they matter.

Isn’t it rather hypocritical to think that because you are the parent you are entitled?

Is it not fair to expect you have to earn your childs respect in the manner as they extend the same respect to you the parent?

How they feel and what they think is as important to them as they want it to be for you the parent.

It is noble that you want to instill your beliefs, share the moral expectations you grew up with to your children but don’t discount that we all are entitled to exercise our free will to question what we are taught if need be and to believe accordingly.

Forcing our children to believe or even to follow the same religious instructions you did is not always th best thing.

I grew up in the teachings of Catholicism because it wa our family culture.

As I grew up I began to explore the teachings of other religions such as Baptist and a hint of Buddhism as well as Spiritualism.

I was not a fan of any religious institutions and therefore made a decision to study silence, a place so many say where God resides.

Within this silence you can hear the breath of God.

Every parent and child relationship is important as long as expectations are kept to a minimum because there is always room for compromise.

That your child is gay should no more be repulsive then you forcing them to be something they are not.

To keep an open mind and a willingness to listen without interruption is all a child asks.

Why would you bully your child even more than they might already be in school?

Who we are is absolutely as natural and normal existence for us as being heterosexual is for our parents.

The utmost important thing in any of our lives should be love first and foremost.

How difficult would it be to love your children a you love yourself?

 

Being Gay

What is life if you cannot love someone of your choice?

All of life is fluid and how best to be a better person then to help improve the lives of others whether its family, friend, peer or stranger.

Love of my people is not a crime as some religious institutions and politicians would have you believe.

For those of us who know our place with God and  who walk in step with His son Jesus Christ each and every day, whom we love makes no difference to them.

The fact that we exercise our birth right to love another humane being is the least of their expectations.

Being gay does not define me but it is merely a small section in the tapestry of my life.

I did not turn, become or chose to be gay due to the experience I had as a small child.

I knew before that experience that I was different, felt different inside my self, inside my mind and inside my body.

I lived in secret my whole life until I was able to safely come out without the fear of being exiled by my mother.

No child wants to disappoint their parents nor do they want their parent to deny them

I have to confess that there was a long period beginning in my youth that I considered suicide making many attempts but obviously never succeeding.

The anguish gays endure is immeasurable and as adults we must take responsibility for this.

I survived my all school years without detection because I had a reputation early on for being an exceptional athlete, a leader and somewhat of a mentor.

It never bothered me that my peers saw me as a tomboy and I never hesitated to confront the bullies in school.

I had always been aware of the consequences of my actions and took responsibility for them.

When I think of it now I guess you could say I was an activist for social justice even back then.

Ultimately it is the universe which knows our future, our path and which journey we will choose and it is up to us to trust our intuition for it is this inner voice that gives us the truth.

What I continue to seek in my life is a closer connection with my presence within.

We must not be afraid of who’s looking back at us when we look in the mirror.

Being Gay

If you truly want to be Christ like live your life guided in love. One of the biggest misconceptions society has of us is that we are Godless and we don’t deserve to be religious no matter what our faith.

Not hating to disappoint the masses we do in fact not only believe, but have faith and do so because like every humane being we were entitled to this at birth.

Our relationship with our maker is an individual experience of our own accord.

Being gay doesn’t negate our right to exercise our beliefs or our faith.

Although I was raised Catholic I am an avid Spiritualist for reasons you will learn along the way in my blogs.

My purpose in life is to motivate, encourage and inspire others that by bringing forth what is within in them, what they bring forth will save them.

I want to make this abundantly clear that once I did this for myself I set myself free. I love the life of free will and I have no problem questioning religious teachings of any faith.

I learn something new everyday about my relationship with the presence within and I believe it’s a never-ending journey.

The closer I get to the center of my presence within the better I feel about what life has in store for me.

The truth of the matter is this, I believe we are here to be of service to others, to show compassion, empathy, to give and share but most important to love.

Our lives belong to us, to the presence within without the possibility of being separated.

When you recognize who is looking back at you in the mirror then and only then will you have realized your truth.

We cannot live for our parents or be what they could not achieve for themselves.

This is our lives and we should see our parents as our mentors not our masters.

Most of us have one shot at life and we should be grateful for everything take nothing for granted, be thankful, show gratitude and not squander our daily blessings.

I think of my life as a daily challenge of how I can make life better from someone else whether it be by words or by actions.

What can I do to make my community better and empower the lives of others from our gay youth to our military brothers and sisters to the elderly.

This causes me and hopefully others to think, to be and to change enough to make a difference.

We aren’t entitled to anything but the words we speak, thoughts we create and actions we display.

Our behavior should come from the heart just as our kindness and love do.

I learned early on that accumulating things for one’s self is selfish because you cannot take it with you.

We came here naked and shall leave in the same condition.

We would do better in paying attention to accumulating blessings, good deeds and giving love abundantly without expectation.

I’m on a journey every day to live the life of love, the life of Christ how about you?

 

Being Gay

When your child tells you their gay,no matter how or what you feel, embrace them.

They are your flesh and blood whom you have loved and nurtured from inside the womb until their birth.

You had participated in the production of a life and are therefore responsible until death do they part.

Hopefully as parents you felt nothing less than love for the child from the moment of conception.

I’m sure you have laughed, cried, educated, taught and shared your joy with this child as well as disciplined.

To deny, reject, abuse or neglect this child is a crime against God.

Reference Psalms 127:3, Behold children are a gift of th Lord.

Denying your child in any capacity is denying God in every capacity and it would be wise to understand this.

I am not a religious scholar by any means but I have lived a life filled with anguish and torment complicated by unspeakable experiences which gave me a different perspective of God.

We were estranged when I was three but because of my loving relationship with the woman  He choose for me to be with I have discovered the path in which to take.

I was fifty when I experienced enlightenment that mended my relationship with my presence within.

It took me fifty years to finally forgive Him and I am a better person because of it.

I am who I was born to be no matter what others say or feel.

I know like so many others that gay children/youth are exceptional even extraordinary humane beings who matter as much as any child.

It takes courage to share such information to those you love because deep inside you are aware of their fear, anger and displeasure for individuals who are not as they believe they should be.

It’s a decision made usually after a period of anguish, deep thoughts and much suffering.

There is no shame no guilt in being gay although society will make every effort to try and convince us otherwise.

Yet the consequences are far uncertain for the child then you the parent.

Love begets love, think for a moment the very miracle of birth.

Think for a moment all the couples who cannot conceive for one reason or another.

Consider their deep anguish, their grief and then there are those parents who exile their children for being gay, what a tradegy.

Think about the fear and emotional torment your child suffers at not knowing how you’ll react.

Think for a moment how difficult their life has been pretending to be someone, something they are not just to please you.

I’ve always understood that parents teach their children to be honest, fair, kind, empathetic, respectful, compassionate, responsible and most important loving.

A caring and kind child is a happy child. How can you expect your child to behave one way when you yourselves do not practice what you preach?

This is someone you raised up from infancy so why is it that the focus is always on sex when it comes to gay people and their relationships?

What does this say about how you raised your child?

You did nothing wrong and NO, God has not punished you for any past inequities.

Being gay is not a choice, this is my life and I have been gay the entire fifty-four years of it.

I know what lies within me and that I can never be separated from it.

I choose to live the life of Christ and to be mindful of what my life’s purpose is.

I am a hole in the flute …

I am a hole in the flute that the Christ’s breath moves through – listen to tbhis music.
Hafiz

At what age did you discover, did you know you were gay. How did you feel, what did that make you feel like?

What was the one experience that allowed you to be free to be yourself without fear or shame.

I knew I was gay from early childhood even though I did not come out until I was twenty.

Times were much different in those days back in the late seventies early eighties.

There were many factors that prevented me from being my true self, family expectations, our culture being Spanish and raised Catholic.

There was no place to go for support, nobody to confide in and parents still had ALL the power to punish you as they saw fit.

I wasn’t willing to jeopardize my relationship with a teacher whom I had a great deal of respect for and was probably a safe person in which to share but I wasn’t sure.

Living a lie was tormenting but my life was complicated and that only caused more anguish.

Now there are all sorts of support groups in which young kids can go in safety and confidence.

My gay life is a happy life filled with joy, growth, compability, understanding, compassion, empathy, charity and more love then I could have ever hoped for.

This is my normal life,my ordinary life and the life I was born to live.

Our lives matter and don’t let anyone tell you different.

We have a right to be happy and to live the best lives we know how without shame or having to lie.

My life doesn’t revolve around being gay it’s just a part of who I am, a humane being, a daughter, cousin, God Parent, friend peer and spouse.

My life is the right life for me and being a child of God, I a blessed with His love as well as we all are.

Being Gay

At what age did you discover, did you know you were gay. How did you feel, what did that make you feel like?

What was the one experience that allowed you to be free to be yourself without fear or shame.

I knew I was gay from early childhood even though I did not come out until I was twenty.

Times were much different in those days back in the late seventies early eighties.

There were many factors that prevented me from being my true self, family expectations, our culture being Spanish and raised Catholic.

There was no place to go for support, nobody to confide in and parents still had ALL the power to punish you as they saw fit.

I wasn’t willing to jeopardize my relationship with a teacher whom I had a great deal of respect for and was probably a safe person in which to share but I wasn’t sure.

Living a lie was tormenting but my life was complicated and that only caused more anguish.

Now there are all sorts of support groups in which young kids can go in safety and confidence.

My gay life is a happy life filled with joy, growth, compability, understanding, compassion, empathy, charity and more love then I could have ever hoped for.

This is my normal life,my ordinary life and the life I was born to live.

Our lives matter and don’t let anyone tell you different.

We have a right to be happy and to live the best lives we know how without shame or having to lie.

My life doesn’t revolve around being gay it’s just a part of who I am, a humane being, a daughter, cousin, God Parent, friend peer and spouse.

My life is the right life for me and being a child of God, I a blessed with His love as well as we all are.

Being Gay

To presume society or better yet the general public knows how our lives are conducted is an error of itself.

I find that much of society’s perception of us is based on media coverage of such events like the Gay Pride Parades or gay issues concerning our military as well as our educators.

Much of the media has been one-sided on specific issues that concern gay rights and thus shows us in an unfavorable light.

I’d like to see them be more fair in their coverage of how we can have a positive effect in the community.

I also find that it has always been the religious right who encourage conflict,  create a sense of mistrust and fabricate numerous untruths to instill fear about us.

They provoke unrest and like to complicate matters by focusing on those passages in the Bible that condemn our behavior.

We all interpret the Bible differently as no two people see the same thing in the same way.

I would never pretend to be a religious scholar but I can say that I am one of millions who use my free will to think for myself when it comes to God.

I was raised Catholic, visited many different churches and faiths but I chose a long time ago to a Spiritualist.

Religion and Spirituality are clearly two different things. I was never obedient to any teachings rather I asked many, many questions.

We all would be wise to ask more questions rather than believe all that is told to us.

People need to be aware that there is just as much support for us in organizations such as PFLAG and GLSEN as well as GSA clubs in our local High Schools, community colleges and Universities.

There is so much support to uncover in our schools that go undetected to the general public because the media seems more concerned with looking the other way instead of reporting a balanced story.

I’ve chosen to write this Being Gay blog because we need a place to talk openly and freely without the chance of being persecuted.

I’m here to enlighten not just our gay youth but any gay person who wants to share their feelings, their thoughts and their truths about who we are.

I’m here to listen, to dispense when necessary a path, directions, suggestions,compassion, empathy and education about what it’s like being gay.

This is my emphatically happy gay life and I thank God every day for the breath He blows though my nostrils.

I’m just following in the footsteps of Jesus who was as much an activist for social justice as Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Teresa and all the other foot soldiers like me who give voice to those being muffled by their parents, peers or any other persons of society who refuses to learn the truth about us.

It is those individuals who choose ignorance rather than knowledge that will surely suffer the longest.

The religious communities say they represent God in fighting against homosexuality.

I say that when God stands between us in our lives He will assuredly walk away with the one who loves Him without prejudice.

I don’t see those who treat us with indifference as a threat nor do I fear them for they are merely blind to the ways of God’s love.

They lack the knowledge that comes with every persons birth rights.

They lack the simple ability to love as God loves.

I choose love over hate every time for it is not only Gods way but the only way.

I challenge those who fear me to give me one good reason why you feel this way.

Tell me what you think you know about us.

Being Gay

It has been my experience that one of the easiest ways to resolve any conflict or misunderstanding is with starting an open dialogue.

It is important for everyone to be aware that you cannot force people to behave in ways that are unnatural for them.

You cannot imagine the mental torment and emotional anguish we must live with in order to pretend to be someone, something we are not.

Why would you want to force any belief on someone just because that’s what’s natural for you?

You can no more make someone love you then you can make someone into something they are not.

My lifestyle is no different then my siblings, friends or neighbors.

I go have the same routine of getting up, brushing my teeth, showering, maybe having breakfast and any other preparation for the day.

I have responsibilities not just to my life but my partner as well. We are a couple who do what couples do in terms of sharing household duties.

We kiss and say “I love you” on the way out the door expressing our feelings openly and exchanging pleasantries of having a good day at work.

Our life is not complicated by any means as others would want you to think.

Our sexual lives are just as private as any ordinary couple. The only people who seem to have an issue with gay sex are straight people.

Being gay is the most ordinary and natural existence I know. It’s what I am but rather who I am.

That’s not to say my life revolves around being gay but rather I live a life filled with gratitude, compassion, empathy and understanding.

I choose to look for ways to bridge broken relationships, encourage mending fences by talking and listening.

I don’t understand the difficulty people have with  wanting to resolve their differences.

I have been blessed throughout my life to have had teachers who inspired me to pursue my dreams.

They were my support system when I had nobody at home.

Education is the answer to many if not all questions related to this subject.

I for one prefer spending my time on more important issues like finding ways to help the homeless, providing help to families in dire straits.

I choose to give my attention to matters of the heart where we can make a real difference in people’s lives who couldn’t give two cents about other people’s sex lives.

I choose to spend my time with people who want to make a difference in others lives.

The gay youth, young adults and all other gay people are just as valuable to society as anyone else.